I've climbed up this talent tree and I can't get down
James and I basically share one brain, which is convenient if a little eerie. Earlier this week, within thirty seconds of each other and with no previous agreement, we both started new Warcraft characters. Mine is a little green-haired gnome mage, and his is a night elf druid. I decided that my gnome is going to live amongst the night elves and self-identify as a night elf, like monkeys that have human families and think they are people, or, for that matter, my dog. Or Mowgli. Well, did Mowgli think he was a wolf or something? Or is that Tarzan? I don't remember. Anyway, it doesn't matter. If anyone points out my gnome's gnome-ness, she will cry and protest and act confused. I wish I could somehow get her to learn the night-elf language, but I think that's impossible. Whenever she runs around in the night-elf lands, these tall, intimidating elves flirt with her/chat with her/challenge her to duels like crazy. They're FASCINATED by her Otherness.
Also, the gnomes are really brainy and basically are dorks, so this character might be the closest to my actual personality in real life. When my gnome flirts, she says, "At this time, I think you should purchase me an alcoholic beverage and engage in diminutive conversation with me in hopes of establishing a rapport." That's pure Jocelyn, right there.
Oh yeah, and just to up the geek ante a little, I'm totally speccing her frost. And if you don't know what that means, good for you; there may still be hope for you to be cool.
2 comments:
If you really want to fascinate them, follow Helen Andelin's advice from Fascinating Womanhood (see here).
Sadly, there are actually women out there who think this is the right thing to do. Sadder still, this woman comes from my own religious background.
You know, I can understand the value of these types of behaviours. But my gnome doesn't have time to prepare dinner for anyone, or to have children, let alone dress them up like little treasures--she's too busy FIGHTING EVIL and SAVING INNOCENT PEOPLE FROM MONSTERS.
In particular, this advice is not that useful: "When you arise, take care of your appearance. Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking." All of my warcraft characters run around with a perpetual layer of dried blood, caked mud, and other types of grime on their armor. It actually adds to their armor ratings.
Unlike my warcraft characters, though, I myself follow all of these directives to the letter, as you can imagine. I think the basis for the success of mine and James's relationship is how much respect I have for the world of strain he occupies, and how he, in turn, understands that my number one priority in life is making him happy and comfortable.
Or something like that.
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