"some assembly required," and other euphemisms Pt. 1
I've bought these FIRA chests from IKEA before. I already have two of them and I like them OK. I went to get another one yesterday afternoon. One significant change has been implemented into the whole FIRA ideology since I was last at IKEA though: they're flat-packed now, which is another way of saying...
[Not that anything flat-packed is impossible; I'm normally a flat-packed-wizard. But stay with me.]
The steps shown in the following photo, 13 and 14, are deceptive. "Put in a few nails! Flip the drawer around! It's fun!" is the approximate message the illustration conveys about steps 13 and 14.
This is a LIE. What this step actually means is, "each of the 5 drawers in this unit is assembled with 8 tiny nails! That's 40 nails altogether! It's really hard to nail them! Pre-drilled holes, with screws, would have worked a lot better, except we're IKEA and we're too CHEAP! So instead, you can spend 2 hours alternately nailing and swearing, not including the 15 minutes you will spent whimpering after you hit the flesh of one of your fingers with your hammer!" [No picture of this, mainly because the finger does not look nearly convincingly injured enough, even though it still REALLY HURTS] "Oh, and then when you finally DO get all the nails in, including 4 nails of your own because we won't give you enough nails to include the 8 that will get bent while you are nailing them, the drawers won't even go in smoothly because the design has failed to account for the added width of the nail-heads sticking out of the sides of each drawer!"
"Oh, and also, the little drawers of the NEW FIRA, unlike the old FIRA, have little holes on both sides so you can't use them for the project you thought you could use them for!"
This whole instruction booklet, in fact, could be summarized with
To: Jocelyn
From: IKEA
You just paid us $17 so we could SCREW YOU OVER
2 comments:
These drawers are making me cry -- thanks for making me laugh! I had hoped someone would have some handy tips for circumventing the nails. I would just be gluing mine, but my clamps aren't large enough. It looks like I'll be making a run to the hardware store, anyway, as my bent nail count is 18 and counting! Only three more little drawers... and three other chests to go. *sigh*
yes, i was glad to read that others are as frustrated with fira as i am. the large drawers work fine, it's the 3 small ones that have been sent straight from the devil. 8 nails in each? make that 4 in each - the other ones are now as crooked as a politician. i'm doing the boxes in stages to avoid despair.
becky
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