More thoughts thought

So, I wrote this extremely funny blog entry at 3:40 this morning, in my head. I was awoken by what sounded like one or more people stomping up and down the street in front of my apartment building, banging tin trash can lids together and shouting a "aaaah-ah!" song. This really happened, and if I had been more awake it might have seemed more weird. The blog entry was about civic responsibility and stewardship, but it was also very funny, and I think it had a STOMP joke in it. (Something to do with the guy being on the waiting list for STOMP, like Tobias and Blue Man group on Arrested Development, which I think is where my sleepy brain got the idea.) I think it might have also had a Nazi-related curfew joke as well. In that tired, 3:40 AM way, I thought, "That was hilarious, I have to remember that in the morning," and then I went to sleep. So. Just pretend you just read a hilarious blog entry, ok? Ha ha!

List: Sound elements for a downtown-Edmonton themed STOMP-type performance^*

• Car alarms (whee-ee, whee-ee, usually, although actual found may vary)
• homeless people's shopping carts (make kind of a rhythmic rattling)
• aforementioned trash car lids (clanging)
• People trying to break into my building/parkade (jangling implements, swearing)
• Police cars' sirens
• Me hitting stupid fucking careless crazy people with 3-foot lengths of PVC tubing when they fucking wake me up every day between 4 and 6 with their stupid fucking yelling (an interesting whirring/whooshing sound, followed by the dull impact, and then some injured yelling)^**

* Note: This performance would have nothing to do with the actual STOMP franchise, would not approach anywhere near its level of professionalism, and is not intended to infringe on any trademarks, in spite of the fact that I have now mentioned STOMP four--nay, five--times in this blog entry.
** Note 2: I am not really advocating beating up the crazy people who live on my street, because I'm not that cold--what am I, Ralph Klein?--but I do wish they would SHUT THE FUCK UP. Besides, it's not like I'm saying they should be hit with a crowbar. PVC tubing wouldn't hurt that much.

Earlier entry: Thoughts thought at 6:12 in the morning